Eight things that I ponder at 4 in the morning

1.) Why is it called the Miss Universe Pagaent when only one planet competes?

2.) Why are they called the National Basketball Association and the National Hockey League when two countries (Canada and America) have teams playing in each sport? Shouldn't they therefore be called the International Basketball Association and the International Hockey League?

3.) Why are they called Music Television (MTV) and Video Hits 1 (VH1) when there is neither music or music videos on either station?

4.) Why was "According to Jim" on the air for eight goddamn years?

5.) At what age does taking pictures of your kids in the bathtub stop being cute and start becoming child pornography?

6.) If Jehova's Witnesses believe that only 144,000 people are going to Heaven then why the hell are they always out trying to convert people? Wouldn't that hurt their own chances of getting in?

7.) Whelm - (noun, verb) 1.) engulf, submerge. 2.) overwhelm.
So the definition of whelm is overwhelm? Shouldn't whelm just be whelm? You know when you're underwhelmed because nothing is going on, and you know when you're overwhelmed because too much is going on. So shouldn't being whelmed be something that describes normal everyday activity?

8.) If Harrison Ford happened to be driving a Ford in Norway and accidentally ran into Gerald Ford who was also driving a Ford in Norway, and they both ended up in two seperate fjords, would the headline the next day read "Fords Fords in Fjords"?